The Forgotten Half of the Golden Rule

Many religions and philosophies contain their own version of the ethics of reciprocity, encouraging us to use empathy and reason to figure out how best to treat others by thinking about how we want to be treated. We use empathy to put ourselves in the place of the other, to accept the other as having the same value as ourselves, and to begin to understand what the other may want. We use our reason to remind ourselves that not everyone is the same, and generalise from, "I like ice cream, so I'll give everyone ice cream" to "I like when I am able to enjoy an occasional treat that I find pleasurable, so I will provide an opportunity for an other to do the same." We also use our reason to realize that if we were simply handed everything we asked for, we would soon realize it is not what we want.

Complicated, sure, but simple and useful.

What I often see forgotten in discussions about the "Golden rule" is the idea that we should also treat ourselves the way we want to be treated. We can not spread joy if we drain ourselves of energy, share love if we do not consider ourselves worth love, nurture trust if we can not extend trust, create hope if we lose ourselves to despair, inspire wonder if we don't seek wonder, or build dreams if we refuse to dream. Take time, now and then, to do something nice for yourself, or you will be entering this battle unarmed and unarmoured.